Dandy Manifesto


Dandy Manifesto

Dandys (not dandies) are self-described "faggot with style" anarchist trolls. We were created in the heyday of Anarchist News when people gave a shit about the anarchist interwebz. Spawned from the cesspool of naughty words, the only thing that will satisfy our battle against ennui is the social destruction of mass society.

We acknowledge the limitations of our abilities. To fully understand us is to become us. Not because we are that convincing, but because we are so benumbed by the horrors of the internet that any that follow us walk the path of damnation.

We are losers. This helps us. We don't want to be winners. Most losers try to win, but the standards of society have been set too strict, including how the social war is to be engaged. Those that want to be winners limit themselves to convince others in society to stand in their flock against other forces in society. We desire no such cohesion. Our revolting is of revulsion, not of winning hearts and minds to fight a doomed battle against the forces and systems of domination. Our tactics are our own and "success" is measured in what we destroy. In military terms you could often consider destruction against an opponent a success, but with no strategy for success, the destruction looks pointless. But it is not pointless. We destroy as we desire.

We are villains. Superheroes are a bunch of assholes that defend society. Fuck them. This gives us a very broad tactical ability, but also means we won't be liked and thems the dice. People will want to write stories and sensationalize us because we are fucking interesting though. Without saying (but I will), our villainry is one of narcissism before socio-pathy. We aren't Ted Bundy. We are the Joker! Dress accordingly. All dandys wear their shit nice.

It is not in our belief that we are in some sort of end times. We do not believe that the Empire is waning. We believe this is the most powerful Empire ever and it is still at its very heights of power. We are scared of this, but we are manarchists and don't cry. Our destruction is meant to speed the social conflicts in society and make it want to destroy itself, because it will not do it alone. We will use others to make this happen. We take from Nechayev that being a total dick is the only way to defeat a system of control that wields power beyond imagination.

The systems of domination are global and no petty protest or riot will change this. The militarization of the police in such events is backed by a national guard that is backed by a professional military that can destroy the world or destroy whatever it wants on the world. A breakdown of capitalism will not free us. An end of capitalism, even an infrastructual collapse, beyond economic stagnation, will still see this global system of control. There is currently too much invested in the global system that these very real ties among powerful groups, businesses and families would end simply based on the weaknesses and strengths of capitalism is laughable. The generations can be traced by these people and their legacy is at stake. They are the fucking enemy.

It is our belief that mass society will destroy itself only to benefit the powerful without intervention. So the powerful are the best ones worth destroying to accelerate the process. Conspiracy theorists point to these groups and while we think those guys are fucking bonkers, they picked some awesome targets that have more at stake than keeping mass society alive. Those groups with the deepest pockets and longest histories are the most obvious targets. New money is not as important as old.

Chaos is our friend. Tactical chaos, not the silly kind, will fuck them up. Convince someone that a rich asshole killed his dog (when actually we did(n't)), so that guy will beat the shit out of the rich guy, maybe even kill him. That's a fucking success my friend. People need motivation to do what is really there underneath. That animal that no longer wants this cage around them, that wants out but doesn't know how. Point frustrated youth towards vandalism and maybe they will become the next guy that poisons the water supply in a rich suburb, just because fuck them.

Hoaxes, lies, tricks, pranks, these are methods we use as easily as spreading warm butter. We could be on 4chan tricking pedophiles into anheroing, but we have a more
important mission.



In B4 emile, I took the pink pill!

You were supposed to take the magenta pill! Any side effects?

Preposterous and vain fashion sense! No style!

Because Nechayev totally defeated the system of control. No, wait, he voluntarily turned in a list of participants in a secret society he organized over to the secret police. But that's cool, right, because nihilism? At least he was being a total dick. What's next, the Brandon Darby brigade?

Here's the image you should have run with this: http://i1.ytimg.com/vi/lozmLP5-hw0/hqdefault.jpg

Look good, Dandy! You're the Joker!

nice hat

This is embarrassing...

lol sounds like some anok /b/ro who watched too much batman and fight club

Self important internet anarchists, GTFO.

nihilism is cool.

But talk is cheap.

And learn to write better shit.

"Those groups with the deepest pockets and longest histories are the most obvious targets"

...you mean the Jews, I presume? Personalizing capitalism as the Rothchilds or whatever? And wherever you live is a "rich suburb" to somebody.

Fuck you 4chan anti-semite dork. You superiors Aryans aren't very poor neither.

For fuck's sake, Worker... You know this site is going to be filled with neonazis crowd-posting in a few weeks if you let shit like this be posted. DO SOMETHING.

i think the above commenter was sarcastically drawing out the consequences of the "capitalism doesn't matter; poison people who are richer than you because fuck them" position put forward in this text

Does a farce really deserve sarcasm? Oh, that was just smart guy, you are a fucking genius. And to explain the stupidity of another person's comment as if they were doing something completely rational, that was really helpful. Thank you very much for your interjection!

Yes, fuck analysis, solidarity and praxis and therefore think that any random activity you undertake in almost complete isolation is relevant and useful. Nice little logic loop. Ever wonder why so little has been done with the huge potential of digital sabotage?

I'm an admirer of jeremy hammond by the way. Need more kids like him to have each other's backs so they don't get fucked by the snitches.

Where´s the beauty, where´s the arrogant imagination.

This is no dandy manifesto. This is the usual riot porn "nihilism" or anarcho-primitivism trying to dress nicely. They should just come out of the closet and express their pathetic "cosmic pessimism" and "green nihilism"(http://theanarchistlibrary.org/library/alejandro-de-acosta-green-nihilis...).

It is good that you recognize yourselves as losers. You have no will no power, you just confirm the coming of the Last Man. As for dandies you are clearly poor types who lack any sexiness and style. Anyway how can "cosmic pessimism" be sexy or have beauty. Perhaps i could think of a sexy and stylish pessimist but you certainly are not that if you write shit like "We acknowledge the limitations of our abilities. To fully understand us is to become us."

Just as your idol Emile Cioran, you are even too pathetic to go and commit suicide and in the end you just take pleasure on appearing depressed in public.

Better title you little article "The Loser Manifesto or why we don´t have any abilities".

Iconoclasta Dandi Lucifer Urbano

i had such high hopes for a dandy manifesto :(

this is a "dont"

There are alarmingly few trolls in this comment section. Where did all the trolls go? No trolls to troll the troll? Come on, guise, this is the perfect opportunity. If you're going to extol the virtues of trolling & destroying the allegedly fictitious ideal of solidarity, the apex of your oeuvre would be to troll the concept of trolling itself. Prove your dedication to destruction: DESTROY YOURSELVES.


go fuck yourself and your leather jacket with your fists. PANT PANT.

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